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August 02, 2004

Toenails Smell Like Ass, BTW

There are special blessings that come with having two kids instead of one.

Take impromptu screaming contests in the back of the minivan, for instance. One hardly ever gets those with only one kid. But with two it's just a matter of time.

If a parent is extra lucky, lucky like me, for instance, their two will start said contest when the parent isn't actually in the minivan with them, causing the parent to stub the ever-loving flibbertyshit out of his toe when he rushes back from his one final check of the door locks to pull the dingoes off his children.

But that's only the lucky parents, of course, the parents who are fortunate to have not only that fillip of extra spice added to the whole experience but a whole 'nother--the joy of pulling off half a toenail later on, say, or the warm glow of appreciation engendered by a spouse's observation that some people are perhaps a little obsessive-compulsive when it comes to checking and rechecking the damn door locks.

As for the screaming contest's kind of hard to step on that kind of thing when the baby is bubbling over with mirth at the sight of his sister doing her best Janet Leigh impression.

Aside to the Grandparents: Of course we let her watch Psycho--as much as she wants, day after day after day. It's one of her favorite movies. She's so cute in her little chair, rocking back and forth, talking about how she wouldn't hurt a fly. We're thinking of getting her The Exorcist DVD for Christmas.

I'm not sure how it started. Possibly the boy gave an impatient yell when I went back in the house. He's gotten like that lately. When going bye-bye is mentioned, by gum bye-bye needs to happen PDQ. He will not stand for delays in the process. He has places to be.

What is it with you and my damn pants every time we go somewhere? It's all clear down there, dammit! We gotta hit the road! Time's a-wasting, you ponderous old coot!

Ngnat apparently volleyed the scream back to him, and they were off. He was entranced because he had happened upon a way to make his sister repeatedly do interesting and wonderful things, much as pressing a certain button on the computer again and again makes Daddy do interesting and wonderful things. She was entranced because he erupted into a truly astonishing series of hiccuping belly laughs every time she screamed back.

I was pretty sure they couldn't keep it up for the entire 10 minute drive to the grocery store, but as it turned out, I was wrong.

Posted by Bigwig at August 2, 2004 10:19 PM | TrackBack
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Loce it! Sorry about your toe.

Posted by: Yomama at August 3, 2004 09:53 AM

Opps. That is LOVE it, not LOCE it. Stupid arthritic fingers.

Posted by: Yomama at August 3, 2004 09:55 AM

You and that d@mn toe. I'm surprised you still have both of your big toes.

And I've become a little obsessive about door locks too. Mainly it's my car door. The remote lock is a wonderful thing. You can lock the door upon exiting...and from 10 feet away...and from 25 feet away...and from 50 feet away...can't ever be too sure your door is locked.

Posted by: Kehaar at August 3, 2004 10:05 AM

funny. My car door on the drivers side doesn't even have a lock in the handle anymore. Tis just a black empty hole. Have to lock and unlock from the passenger's side door. Then there is an elaborate minute long strange noise caused by locking and unlocking doors.

Cute story. Sounds like me and Kehaar in the car together. Babbling back and forth.

Posted by: yersister at August 3, 2004 04:29 PM
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