Front page
Archive
Silflay Hraka?


Bigwig is a systems administrator at a public university
Hrairoo is the proprietor of a quality used bookstore
Kehaar is.
Woundwort is a professor of counseling at a private university

The Hraka RSS feed

Email
bigwig AT nc.rr.com

Friends of Hraka
InstaPundit
Daily Pundit
cut on the bias
Meryl Yourish
This Blog Is Full Of Crap
Winds of Change
A Small Victory
Silent Running
Dr. Weevil
Little Green Footballs
ColdFury
Oceanguy
Fragments from Floyd
VodkaPundit
Allah
The Feces Flinging Monkey
the skwib
Dean's World
Little Tiny Lies
The Redsugar Muse
Sperari
Natalie Solent
From the Mrs.
ErosBlog
The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler
On the Third Hand
Public Nuisance
Not a Fish
Rantburg
AMCGLTD
WeckUpToThees!
Electric Venom
Skippy, The Bush Kangaroo
Common Sense and Wonder
Neither Here Nor There
Wizbang!
Bogieblog
ObscuroRant
RocketJones
The Greatest Jeneration
Ravenwolf
Ipse Dixit
TarHeelPundit
Blog On the Run
blogatron
Redwood Dragon
Notables
Greeblie Blog
Have A Cuppa Tea
A Dog's Life
IMAO
Zonitics.com
Iberian Notes
Midwest Conservative Journal
A Voyage to Arcturus
HokiePundit
Trojan Horseshoes
In Context
dcthornton.blog
The People's Republic of Seabrook
Country Store
Blog Critics
Chicago Boyz
Hippy Hill News
Kyle Still Free Press
The Devil's Excrement
The Fat Guy
War Liberal
Assume the Position
Balloon Juice
Iron Pen In A Velvet Glove
IsraPundit
Freedom Lives
Where Worlds Collide
Knot by Numbers
How Appealing
South Knox Bubba
Heretical Ideas
The Kitchen Cabinet
Dustbury.com
tonecluster
Bo Cowgill
mtpolitics.net
Raving Atheist
The Short Strange Trip
Shark Blog
Hoplites
Jimspot
Ron Bailey's Weblog
Cornfield Commentary
Testify!
Northwest Notes
pseudorandom
The Blog from the Core
Ain'tNoBadDude
CroMagnon
The Talking Dog
WTF Is It Now??
Blue Streak
Smarter Harper's Index
nikita demosthenes
Bloviating Inanities
Sneakeasy's Joint
Ravenwood's Universe
The Eleven Day Empire
World Wide Rant
All American
Pdawwg
The Rant
The Johnny Bacardi Show
The Head Heeb
Viking Pundit
Mercurial
Oscar Jr. Was Here
Just Some Poor Schmuck
Katy & Bruce Loebrich
But How's The Coffee?
Roscoe Ellis
Foolsblog
Sasha Castel
Dodgeblogium
Susskins Central Dispatch
DoggerelPundit
Josh Heit
Attaboy
Aaron's Rantblog
MojoMark
As I was saying...
Blog O' Dob
Dr. Frank's Blogs Of War
Betsy's Page
A Knob for Brightness
Fresh Bilge
The Politburo Diktat
Drumwaster's rants
Curt's Page
The Razor
An Unsealed Room
The Legal Bean
Helloooo chapter two!
As I Was Saying...
SkeptiLog AGOG!
Tong family blog
Vox Beth
Velociblog
I was thinking
Judicious Asininity
This Woman's Work
Fragrant Lotus
DaGoddess
Single Southern Guy
Caerdroia
GrahamLester.Com
Jay Solo's Verbosity
TacJammer
Snooze Button Dreams
Horologium
You Big Mouth, You!
From the Inside looking Out
Night of the Lepus
No Watermelons Allowed
From The Inside Looking Out
Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics
Suburban Blight
Aimless
The SmarterCop
Dog of Flanders
From Behind the Wall of Sleep
Beaker's Corner
Bad State of Gruntledness
Who Tends The Fires
Granny Rant
Elegance Against Ignorance
Moxie.nu
Eccentricity
Say What?
Blown Fuse
Wait 'til Next Year
The Pryhills
The Whomping Willow
The National Debate
The Skeptician
Zach Everson
MonkeyWatch
Geekward Ho
Argghhh!!!
Life in New Orleans
Rotten Miracles
Fringe
The Biomes Blog
illinigirl
See What You Share
Truthprobe
Blog d’Elisson
Your Philosophy Sucks
Watauga Rambler
Socialized Medicine
Consternations
Verging on Pertinence
Read My Lips
ambivablog
Soccerdad
The Flannel Avenger
Butch Howard's WebLog
Castle Argghhh!
Andrew Hofer
kschlenker.com
Moron Abroad
White Pebble
Darn Floor
Wizblog
tweedler
Pajama Pundits
BabyTrollBlog
Cadmusings
Goddess Training 101
A & W
Medical Madhouse
Slowly Going Sane
The Oubliette
American Future
Right Side Redux
See The Donkey
Newbie Trucker
The Right Scale
Running Scared
Ramblings Journal
Focus On Reality
Wyatt's Torch

July 15, 2004

Delivering the Meat

So, I go out to my car around 2:30 this afternoon to come to work and piddle around at the office. I get to my car in the driveway about the time some small truck with a chest freezer strapped in the back pulls in. Some scary looking dude gets out and asks me if I am the man of the house.

“Yes,” I reply.

He shakes my hand and says he is from The Meat Locker and he is making deliveries in the area. Great, I figure since I am on the Do Not Call Registry that this guy is taking another approach and just showing up at the house.

“Thanks,” I said, “but I don’t want any.” This is when the attitude began.

“Oh, you don’t?,” he asked, somewhat surprised, as if everyone was following him around the neighborhood like the ice cream truck, wanting to buy his goodies.

“That’s right,” I answered, more rudely than he.

“You don’t like steaks?,” he continues.

“I like them, I just don’t want any.”

“Well, how do you know you don’t want any if you haven’t seen them?”

My temperature rises as I reply, “I don’t have to see them, I know what steaks look like, I just don’t want any of your's.”

“Oh,” he continues, not yet getting the point, “you can’t fit them in your freezer?”

“Yes,” I replied with as much sarcasm as I could muster, and that is a LOT, “I can’t fit them in my freezer.”

“I bet I could fit them in there,” he says with a lot of confidence.

What the hell? Is he showing me how macho he is or trying to impress me with his freezer organization skills? I was ready to go, and getting pissed, no longer concerned with how I came across.

“I’m sure you would do a great job organizing my freezer, but I don’t want any of what you got……..nothing.”

“Fine,” he said, finally getting the idea, “have a good one.” He quickly got in his truck, slammed the door and sped out of my driveway.

I can think of few things as gross to me as buying meat from this strange guy with a big ass freezer strapped down in the bed of his scary looking truck. After he left I thought of all these great things I should have said to him, but the best was, “I am the only one who delivers the meat in this house.”

Damn, I wish he would come back so I could use that one on him.

Posted by Woundwort at July 15, 2004 03:13 PM | TrackBack
Postscript:
First time visitor to House Hraka? Wondering if everything we produce could possibly be as brilliant/stupid/evil/pedantic/insipid/inspired as the post you just read? Check out the Hraka Essentials, the (mostly) reader-selected guide to Hraka's best posts, and decide for yourself.
Comments

I met a guy in a bar once who claims that his job was selling steaks, etc. I think it's the new pyramid scheme/door-to-door sales gig. I can't imagine ANYONE purchasing meat from a guy going door to door. Something about that just screams "serial killer".

Posted by: Kehaar at July 15, 2004 04:30 PM

I agree, and this guy looked the part. For all I know he had a collection of head and body parts in that freezer and I was not about to let his scary ass into my house.

Posted by: Woundwort at July 15, 2004 04:32 PM

In the driveway there came such rude blares
From a hawker of tenderloin wares.
     Now thus sayeth Woundwort:
     (And sir, be attuned for ‘t)
“Raw meat here is solely mein hare’s”

Posted by: Stephen at July 15, 2004 05:46 PM

Where do you think he gets the fresh meat? From the tender loins of those unwary enough to let him in.

Posted by: Dr. Weevil at July 16, 2004 08:01 AM

“I am the only one who delivers the meat in this house.” Can't stop laughing.

Posted by: Mason at July 16, 2004 12:16 PM

Well, home-delivered meat is a great thing. But not from some guy with a freezer in his pickup.

Schwann's, yes. Random guy, no.

Posted by: Sigivald at July 16, 2004 03:40 PM

That sounds more like a bad dream than something that actually happened. Very disturbing.

On a lighter note, now I can't get this out of my head.

Posted by: Greg at July 16, 2004 07:13 PM
Post a comment Note: Comments with more than two dashes per line will be blocked as spam.









Remember personal info?