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November 21, 2003

Holiday Lubricants

Remember, come Turkey Day, that if you want a truly traditional meal, then you'll need a big mug of beer to go with the stuffing and cranberries.

...William Bradford, who would later become governor of Massachusetts, recorded in his journal, "[A]fter we had called on God for direction, we came to this resolution -- to go presently ashore again and to take a better view of the two places which we thought most fitting for us; for we could not now take much time for further search or consideration, our victuals being much spent, especially our beer, and it now being the 19th of December."

Beer writers love to quote the eight words that focus on the central need for beer, but that misses the urgency that attended this decision. The Pilgrims' departure from England had been delayed, so it was late in the year and getting cold as they surveyed the American shore; passengers weren't well and supplies were dwindling -- and, yes, the beer was running low.

Best beers for the heavy meal? Marzens and Oktoberfests go well with turkey, according to Michael Jackson. No, not that one. Red Belgian Ales and fruit beers might also do well according to this article, and the BeerAdvocate has a course by course selection of brews.

Our family Thanksgiving is not under my control this year, so I expect I'll be drinking wine. Think of me when downing your Rare Vos.

Posted by Bigwig at November 21, 2003 12:28 PM | TrackBack
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A pumpkin ale is always one of my favorites with the turkey, which I will be smoking this year. Any good IPA nicely sets off the heavy, savory flavors of stuffing and cranberries.

A nice fruit flavored lambic beer - Lindeman's Peche, or Kriek, goes well with the meal; kind of like cranberry sauce you can drink. Women really seem to like it too, if you can stomach your great Aunt Bertha, who hates beer, swilling your $9/10 ounce bottle treasures.

And for those who are suicidal, you can start drinking a good Belgian Triple. If you are feeling really wild, start doing it early in the day. Triples, with 11 - 15% alcohol, are especially useful for fueling booze-ignited family fights, or for ensuring you are able to pass out quickly and definitively after the meal - as if the carbo coma and tryptophan yield of 4 pounds of turkey isn't sufficient. I'd recommend Delirium Tremens for this purpose. In fact, if you get DT, just skip the turkey and sit around drinking all day. You won't even miss the turkey, or remember missing it on the off chance you do.

Don't forget to pack the turkey - that is the Wild Turkey. A few shots of hard liquor after the overly generous afternoon meal will make your tum tum fell a little better, and clear up room for a third piece of pie. Or more beer. Unterberg, or the other German digestiv, Jaegermeister, are the best for this purpose. In the alternative, some good schnapps, preferably homemade, will do the trick. I reccomend Pear schnapps - Obstler; but the Yugoslavian Sliwowicza will do the trick as well.

Posted by: Blackavar at November 22, 2003 11:31 AM

Proud to list Bradford as an ancestor, my 13th great-grandfather.

Posted by: Aaron's Rantblog at November 23, 2003 09:01 PM

Blackavar... how do you get it into your pipe?

Posted by: Aaron's Rantblog at November 23, 2003 09:02 PM

Pipe? Hell, I use a "Boston University Bong". Anybody who doesn't know what that is... well, didn't go to college in the 80's.

Aaron, shame on you. A real man never makes fun of smoking meat, as it's one of only ways of preparing meat that is acceptable for a manly man.

The other ways, of course, are grilling, frying, warming it up with an oxy-acetyline torch, and raw.

Posted by: Blackavar at November 24, 2003 12:07 PM
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