Front page
Silflay Hraka?

Bigwig is a systems administrator at a public university
Hrairoo is the proprietor of a quality used bookstore
Kehaar is.
Woundwort is a professor of counseling at a private university

The Hraka RSS feed

bigwig AT

Friends of Hraka
Daily Pundit
cut on the bias
Meryl Yourish
This Blog Is Full Of Crap
Winds of Change
A Small Victory
Silent Running
Dr. Weevil
Little Green Footballs
Fragments from Floyd
The Feces Flinging Monkey
Dean's World
Little Tiny Lies
The Redsugar Muse
Natalie Solent
From the Mrs.
The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler
On the Third Hand
Public Nuisance
Not a Fish
Electric Venom
Skippy, The Bush Kangaroo
Common Sense and Wonder
Neither Here Nor There
The Greatest Jeneration
Ipse Dixit
Blog On the Run
Redwood Dragon
Greeblie Blog
Have A Cuppa Tea
A Dog's Life
Iberian Notes
Midwest Conservative Journal
A Voyage to Arcturus
Trojan Horseshoes
In Context
The People's Republic of Seabrook
Country Store
Blog Critics
Chicago Boyz
Hippy Hill News
Kyle Still Free Press
The Devil's Excrement
The Fat Guy
War Liberal
Assume the Position
Balloon Juice
Iron Pen In A Velvet Glove
Freedom Lives
Where Worlds Collide
Knot by Numbers
How Appealing
South Knox Bubba
Heretical Ideas
The Kitchen Cabinet
Bo Cowgill
Raving Atheist
The Short Strange Trip
Shark Blog
Ron Bailey's Weblog
Cornfield Commentary
Northwest Notes
The Blog from the Core
The Talking Dog
WTF Is It Now??
Blue Streak
Smarter Harper's Index
nikita demosthenes
Bloviating Inanities
Sneakeasy's Joint
Ravenwood's Universe
The Eleven Day Empire
World Wide Rant
All American
The Rant
The Johnny Bacardi Show
The Head Heeb
Viking Pundit
Oscar Jr. Was Here
Just Some Poor Schmuck
Katy & Bruce Loebrich
But How's The Coffee?
Roscoe Ellis
Sasha Castel
Susskins Central Dispatch
Josh Heit
Aaron's Rantblog
As I was saying...
Blog O' Dob
Dr. Frank's Blogs Of War
Betsy's Page
A Knob for Brightness
Fresh Bilge
The Politburo Diktat
Drumwaster's rants
Curt's Page
The Razor
An Unsealed Room
The Legal Bean
Helloooo chapter two!
As I Was Saying...
SkeptiLog AGOG!
Tong family blog
Vox Beth
I was thinking
Judicious Asininity
This Woman's Work
Fragrant Lotus
Single Southern Guy
Jay Solo's Verbosity
Snooze Button Dreams
You Big Mouth, You!
From the Inside looking Out
Night of the Lepus
No Watermelons Allowed
From The Inside Looking Out
Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics
Suburban Blight
The SmarterCop
Dog of Flanders
From Behind the Wall of Sleep
Beaker's Corner
Bad State of Gruntledness
Who Tends The Fires
Granny Rant
Elegance Against Ignorance
Say What?
Blown Fuse
Wait 'til Next Year
The Pryhills
The Whomping Willow
The National Debate
The Skeptician
Zach Everson
Geekward Ho
Life in New Orleans
Rotten Miracles
The Biomes Blog
See What You Share
Blog d’Elisson
Your Philosophy Sucks
Watauga Rambler
Socialized Medicine
Verging on Pertinence
Read My Lips
The Flannel Avenger
Butch Howard's WebLog
Castle Argghhh!
Andrew Hofer
Moron Abroad
White Pebble
Darn Floor
Pajama Pundits
Goddess Training 101
A & W
Medical Madhouse
Slowly Going Sane
The Oubliette
American Future
Right Side Redux
See The Donkey
Newbie Trucker
The Right Scale
Running Scared
Ramblings Journal
Focus On Reality
Wyatt's Torch

October 27, 2003

Roommates In The Afterlife

Assuming there is an afterlife, let's say that the preeminent quality of such an existence is the application of Justice. Why else would Hell exist, save to administer justice in the hereafter for actions taken previously?

Not that I believe in a literal Hell.

Why else would persons be reincarnated as various creatures, if not as a reward/punishment for the way the prior life was lived?

Not that I believe in reincarnation.

Most people treasure the idea that at some point in time, everyone gets what's coming to them, even if they don't believe it will ever happen, especially not as the result of the judgement of an omnipotent being.

I was thinking about that when I ran across A Small Victory's lament about the Left and Right.

Ever looked at a couple and think "They deserve each other," not because they work well together, but because each is so much of ass that there's no better fate for them than to be stuck with the other?

If not, well, perhaps my ways of looking at the world aren't as widespread as I assume. I've seen quite a few romantic couples like that in my time, but the most perfect ones were always college roommates.

An Unrepentant Drunk and a Bible Thumper.
A Rastafarian and a Southern Frat Boy. Fortunately, both managed to find common ground whenever the subject turned to marijuana.
A Disco Fan and Punk Musician.
Me and Anyone.

The list goes on and on. At times it was so long that I began to wonder if the staff at Student Housing spent their summers composing lists of incompatible roomates. Slut/Virgin was such a common pairing that upon finding out the condition of one roomate, I'd ask the other one out.

I hope something similar happens in the afterlife. Not to me, of course. I've done nothing to deserve such rough justice, but there's no better fate I can think of for the adherents of Left and Right, and a few others, than to be stuck with each other for all eternity.

If there is a god, a god of Justice, then regardless of the existence of a heaven or hell the following people will check in to the Afterlife Dormitory, walk into the room assigned them and receive the shock of their, deaths.

Afterlife Dormitory Roommate List
Changes are not allowed

Barbara Streisand and Anita Bryant
Hillary Clinton and Rexella Van Impe
Michael Moore and Pat Robertson
Bill Clinton and Phillis Schlafly
Sheryl Crow and Timothy McVeigh
Susan Sarandon and J. Edgar Hoover
Al Franken and Ann Coulter
Molly Ivins and David Brooks
Tom Delay and Cynthia McKinney
Strom Thurmond and Sinead O'Connor
John Ashcroft and Dennis Kucinich
Larry Flynt and Jerry Falwell
Rick Santorum and Rosie O'Donnell
Tom Tomorrow and Jack T. Chick
George Lucas and Jar Jar Binks
Jacques Chirac and Charles DeGaulle
Oral Roberts and Madeline Murray O'Hare
Ted Kennedy and Carrie Nation

Get To Know Each Other Mixer At 8:00 in the Rec Room.
Bring your appetite, we're be serving our finest Jalapeno Lutefisk!

Update: This post has been edited by Winston Smith

Posted by Bigwig at October 27, 2003 03:19 PM | TrackBack
First time visitor to House Hraka? Wondering if everything we produce could possibly be as brilliant/stupid/evil/pedantic/insipid/inspired as the post you just read? Check out the Hraka Essentials, the (mostly) reader-selected guide to Hraka's best posts, and decide for yourself.

Rearrange the roomies so they are of the same gender!

Posted by: meg at October 27, 2003 07:39 PM

What, and make it easier on them? I think not.

Posted by: bigwig at October 27, 2003 10:13 PM

What is a nice guy like David Brooks doing there?

Posted by: Ted at October 27, 2003 11:08 PM

Topicality, mostly, 'cause I like watching him and Molly fight. It's my afterlife, I get to be unfair.

But you're right, he doesn't really deserve it, not like a lot of the others.

Posted by: bigwig at October 27, 2003 11:29 PM

Mmmm... Lutefisk. Truly a dish from the very fjords of Hell.

Posted by: TheMasterTimekeeper at October 28, 2003 11:38 AM

Mebbe you should put a man, a woman and a lesbian in the same room. And the woman can fall in love with the man, the man with the lesbian, and the lesbian with the woman. he he he. No one's ever thought of that.

Posted by: Troll King at October 28, 2003 04:38 PM

You probably ought to take it easier on Dick Armey, too.

No congressman was ever easier on the taxpayer, or harder on Child Protective Services in D.C. - which had the bad habit of losing little black children who later turned up dead. He actually partnered with Eleanor Holmes Norton (!) to force a restructuring of the juvenile justice system. Oh yeah, and he was also a reasonably staunch libertarian.

Perhaps you're thinking about Tom Delay?

Besides, if life was really unfair, you'd put him in the room with Trent Lott - a fellow Republican whose gravy-train spending probably pissed off former college economics professor Armey to no end.

Posted by: Blackavar at October 28, 2003 05:39 PM

Yea, It was the Hammer I was thinking about. Must remember not to make up the pairs at 2 in the morning next time.

Posted by: bigwig at October 28, 2003 08:38 PM
Post a comment Note: Comments with more than two dashes per line will be blocked as spam.

Remember personal info?