Front page
Silflay Hraka?

Bigwig is a systems administrator at a public university
Hrairoo is the proprietor of a quality used bookstore
Kehaar works at a regional newspaper
Woundwort is a professor of counseling at a private university

The Hraka RSS feed

bigwig AT

Friends of Hraka
Daily Pundit
cut on the bias
Meryl Yourish
This Blog Is Full Of Crap
Winds of Change
A Small Victory
Silent Running
Dr. Weevil
Little Green Footballs
Fragments from Floyd
The Feces Flinging Monkey
Dean's World
Little Tiny Lies
The Redsugar Muse
Natalie Solent
From the Mrs.
The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler
On the Third Hand
Public Nuisance
Not a Fish
Electric Venom
Skippy, The Bush Kangaroo
Common Sense and Wonder
Neither Here Nor There
The Greatest Jeneration
Ipse Dixit
Blog On the Run
Redwood Dragon
Greeblie Blog
Have A Cuppa Tea
A Dog's Life
Iberian Notes
Midwest Conservative Journal
A Voyage to Arcturus
Trojan Horseshoes
In Context
The People's Republic of Seabrook
Country Store
Blog Critics
Chicago Boyz
Hippy Hill News
Kyle Still Free Press
The Devil's Excrement
The Fat Guy
War Liberal
Assume the Position
Balloon Juice
Iron Pen In A Velvet Glove
Freedom Lives
Where Worlds Collide
Knot by Numbers
How Appealing
South Knox Bubba
Heretical Ideas
The Kitchen Cabinet
Bo Cowgill
Raving Atheist
The Short Strange Trip
Shark Blog
Ron Bailey's Weblog
Cornfield Commentary
Northwest Notes
The Blog from the Core
The Talking Dog
WTF Is It Now??
Blue Streak
Smarter Harper's Index
nikita demosthenes
Bloviating Inanities
Sneakeasy's Joint
Ravenwood's Universe
The Eleven Day Empire
World Wide Rant
All American
The Rant
The Johnny Bacardi Show
The Head Heeb
Viking Pundit
Oscar Jr. Was Here
Just Some Poor Schmuck
Katy & Bruce Loebrich
But How's The Coffee?
Roscoe Ellis
Sasha Castel
Susskins Central Dispatch
Josh Heit
Aaron's Rantblog
As I was saying...
Blog O' Dob
Dr. Frank's Blogs Of War
Betsy's Page
A Knob for Brightness
Fresh Bilge
The Politburo Diktat
Drumwaster's rants
Curt's Page
The Razor
An Unsealed Room
The Legal Bean
Helloooo chapter two!
As I Was Saying...
SkeptiLog AGOG!
Tong family blog
Vox Beth
I was thinking
Judicious Asininity
This Woman's Work
Fragrant Lotus
Single Southern Guy
Jay Solo's Verbosity
Snooze Button Dreams
You Big Mouth, You!
From the Inside looking Out
Night of the Lepus
No Watermelons Allowed
From The Inside Looking Out
Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics
Suburban Blight
The SmarterCop
Dog of Flanders
From Behind the Wall of Sleep
Beaker's Corner
Bad State of Gruntledness
Who Tends The Fires
Granny Rant
Elegance Against Ignorance
Say What?
Blown Fuse
Wait 'til Next Year
The Pryhills
The Whomping Willow
The National Debate
The Skeptician
Zach Everson
Geekward Ho
Life in New Orleans
Rotten Miracles
The Biomes Blog
See What You Share
Blog d’Elisson
Your Philosophy Sucks
Watauga Rambler
Socialized Medicine
Verging on Pertinence
Read My Lips
The Flannel Avenger
Butch Howard's WebLog
Castle Argghhh!
Andrew Hofer
Moron Abroad
White Pebble
Darn Floor
Pajama Pundits
Goddess Training 101
A & W
Medical Madhouse
Slowly Going Sane
The Oubliette
American Future
Right Side Redux
See The Donkey
Newbie Trucker
The Right Scale
Running Scared
Ramblings Journal
Focus On Reality
Wyatt's Torch

October 23, 2002

The Dirty Dozen

The Dirty Dozen - The Latest from Bigwig

Somehow there was a screw-up with this. This post is from Bigwig and not Woundwort.

It'll be crowded tonight, assuming that this appears on Wednesday or Thursday. Not everyone is staying the entire week, but everyone will be here tonight. The house we're staying in claims to sleep 12 (It also has no heat or cable, so expect reports of mayhem if the weather turns cold and rainy.), but I imagine it will be seem kinda crowded by about 10:30 tonight, which is when the last 5 or 6 people get here from the Hatteras ferry.

We are;

1. A Secret Service agent whom I taught to eat ants when he was a kid, who refuses to tell us where he's been. All we know is that he was out of the country for something like 3 months prior to the trip. He's as much as told us that if anything .....interesting happens he won't be able to make the trip. Interesting!? Bastard. Incidentally, Secret Service agents have pretty cool business cards.

2. An oxymoronic Scotsman, in that he once lent me twenty dollars. He was going to fly down, but hasn't been able to get his pilot's license in time. Too bad, as we had planned on using him and his Piper Cherokee as a Fish Spotter.

3. A mild mannered high school english teacher, who in his salad days once broke a man's jaw with a single mighty blow, after seeing the guy hit his date. He will wear the same pair of cut off shorts the entire week, and does a little white guy jazzy headshake to music he likes after a 12-pack.

4. A mild mannered mortgage broker, who in his salad days survived totaling his motorcycle at 80 mph while out on a drug run.

5. A cop from Roanoke, VA., who has retired from police work in his late thirties to become an artist. I knew him back in the days of my high genius, when I didn't wash my clothes for weeks at a time. He and and a couple others took said clothes, enclosed them in a hefty bag and threw them in a pond. I happened upon them as they surveyed their handiwork, and asked what was going on.

"We're throwing rocks at the trash bag until it sinks." he said.

Well, that sounded like fun, so I joined right in. The bag sank, and I didn't notice my clothes were gone for three or four hours. The bag was 12 feet down by then, and weighed several hundred pounds.

I had to retaliate, so I moved the contents of his room to the roof of his house. Getting a bunk bed to balance on the peak of the house turnd out to be easier than I expected, though.

6. Kehaar, my brother, who dates only insane women. I suspect him of lurking in the dumpsters behind pharmacies, where he gets women's phone numbers from discarded lithium prescriptions. If he holds true to form, he will fall asleep sitting upright in his folding chair at the beach after four beers. We'll then take a picture of him and forget to develop it.

7. A man who married extemely well, and which allows him to pursue his chosen career as an assistant golf-course landscaper without have to deal with such niggling details as cashing a paycheck or having to show up for work. He once hit Kehaar on the forehead with a raw egg from a distance of about 100 yards. It was a thing of beauty.

8. A gourmet beer connoisseur, whom we expect great things out of in the area of supplying us with rare alcohols. Alcohols which we will be unable to appreciate after about 3 of them.

9. A knick-knack salesman (he prefers the term promotional items) who will call us lightweights as we collapse into bed at one in the morning, then pass out and keep everyone up all night listening to his collection of deviated septum noises.

10. A twenty-seven year old hippie who custom built all the hardware for one of our bigger regional ISP's....nine years ago. He's allergic to alcohol. Fair's fair! We will make him drive everywhere.

11. A man who works with propane and propane accessories, and whom has graced the cover of Fine Woodworking magazine.

12. I can't think of anything interesting about me that a regular reader wouldn't already know, and I can't think of why a casual reader would still be here.

Posted by Woundwort at October 23, 2002 03:49 PM | TrackBack
First time visitor to House Hraka? Wondering if everything we produce could possibly be as brilliant/stupid/evil/pedantic/insipid/inspired as the post you just read? Check out the Hraka Essentials, the (mostly) reader-selected guide to Hraka's best posts, and decide for yourself.
Post a comment Note: Comments with more than two dashes per line will be blocked as spam.

Remember personal info?